Jan. 20th, 2005

etherial: an idealized black vortex on a red field (Default)
Today is "Not One Red Cent Day." Buy absolutely nothing today to protest that whackjob in the round room.

And now for the rant:

Dear Drivers of SUVs who do not clear the snow off of your car:

I am aware, as much as I might wish otherwise, that SUVs are a status symbol. While I disagree with any other things you might claim as 'merit,' your desire to appear to be the most wealthy and adenturous member of the small penis club is understandable, and I cannot begrudge your need to be the most loved man with a small penis.

But do you have no pride in your status symbol? Is it really necessary to create an even greater driving hazard with your vehicle? Surely the other members of the small penis club will find your vehicle that much more phallic if you keep it clean and shining, but no, you instead insist on just turning the wipers on high and driving at 70 miles an hour to clear off your vehicle.

Your Truly,
Man who takes pride in driving his real car.

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